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War and Internal Dialogue

Many of you may have been heartbroken by the war in Ukraine over the past month. The daily news reports the tragic situation that makes us want to cover our eyes. To witness such news, in addition to the prolonged Corona pandemic, may be something that makes you feel vaguely overwhelmed and helpless.

One way to get out of this helplessness might be to try to do something that you can in the way of concrete support, such as donating money, or to think a little about what you can do now.

It made me wonder why wars happen, why it is so difficult to have a dialogue, and I was reminded that this is a major challenge for mankind. But when it comes to the difficulty of dialogue, it is not limited to nations, but it may also be true in our immediate relationships, and perhaps because I am a counselor, I sometimes feel that it is really difficult in our own minds as well.
And what I am trying to say is...psychologically, I believe that our inner world is reflected in the outer world, and if each one of us can talk to and connect with the various selves in our minds, there will be no wars in the outer world. It may seem quite obvious when I write it like this.

 For example, we all may have some sort of aggressive part within ourselves. If it is directed at others, it may be "I hate that person," "I will not forgive that person," "I will get even with that person," etc. If it is directed at ourselves, it may be "I cannot accept myself like this," "I am no good," or "The will be better off without me”. And usually, these parts of ourselves are there to protect ourselves from those around us and to protect our vulnerable selves.
You may want to turn away from this part of yourself, but if you do, it may run amok or explode, and your mind may become divided. And this may lead to a fracturing of your relationship with the world around you and with others.

So, what if we try to talk to the part of our mind? First, let's look at the aggressive part of ourselves. Think of it as if it were a person, and ask, "Why do you think that?" What do you really want?" "Why should you feel that way?" How can you be a little more peaceful?" Try to speak to or have a dialogue with the part of you that is angry.

Then you may come up with another feeling, such as "What I really want is this," or "It's hard to be there if I don't feel this way.” You may create a little space in your mind for your vulnerable self that really wants to be protected. Then the balance in your mind will change. And this may lead to changes in your relationship with the people in front of you and the world around you.

I encourage you to connect with and talk to various parts of inner self. This may lead to a better understanding with your close family and friends, and to a better coexistence with others while coming to terms with society. I dream that this may eventually lead to the elimination of war and the realization of peace in the world.

I am sure that there are people who, even if they are not as aggressive as those mentioned above, still feel that there is a part of them that does not move or move forward as they would like, that there is a part of them that feels out of place or that they have trouble dealing with.

At the Student Support Room, we help you have an internal dialogue without hating or fighting with yourself. Please visit us.


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